Well then.....

The last few days have been an absolute blur! For those that were wondering, yes it was indeed my birthday on Sunday. Saturday Hud was on a football field all day and Karen and the family came up from the Valley so we could exchange kids and have a birthday supper together. We ordered in Chinese food and we had cake and all. Thanks to everyone who has been asking where I have gone....

Sunday we were to have dinner at my birthmom's house. Upon arriving we learn that Grandmother had fallen getting ready to come to the party. My birth mom had found her on the bedroom floor when she went to get her. Ambulance trip to the emergency center near her home. They say she fractured her hip. Ambulance ride to the hospital in town. They say no fracture but they want to keep her. Large man enters emerg, grandmother gets booted from cubicle to hallway. Birth mom left at 1:30 am, grandmother still in hall. I get there at noon on Monday as I had to go to the moms group and show the ladies their craft instructions for the day. Grandmother still in hall all alone. Mother and aunt and two cousins have gone to get her some lunch. They returned and then fed her and then left to get some rest. Both mother and aunt are sick. I told her that I would stay with her 'til they took her upstairs.

Four in the afternoon and we are still waiting. Ten minutes the nurse says. Finally they call over the speaker they need the patient in the hall transferred. No one came. Next call they came and up we went. They settled her and I waited in the hall and was joined by my birthmom again. We then went in to her and just caught supper. She ate like crazy. She hadn't really had anything other than soup since breakfast the day before. When she was done eating she was quite sure it was time to go home. When we told her she couldn't go home she got annoyed with us. She tried to get off the bed, demanded her keys etc. She does not realize that she will never go home again. She has had incident after incident and has been waiting on the nursing home list for five months.

I finally decided at 7 pm that I needed to go home to my family. I kissed her goodbye and as I was putting on my coat she asked what would happen if she expired while I was gone. I told her that I would miss her very much and that I would want her to go knowing how much I loved her and then I left. I think that was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Sam and I went in this morning to find that she had had a rough night and when she woke had been calling for Wendy. Everyone was asking if I was Wendy and I kept saying no. I'm the grandaughter. She had been trying to climb out between the rails on the bed. She was angry with everyone. I was taken out by the social workers who wanted to know if her confusion etc was a regular thing or a result of the fall. Sadly that's grandmother. They agree she cannot go home. Ever. Thankfully. We stayed for awhile, watched her walk with the physiotherapist and then tucked her back into her chair in time for lunch. I'll go again tomorrow, I'll go as long as I need to, as long as she is with us.